#9 Lori Eich
Weight: 10-12 stone (changes w/Daylight savings time)
Quote: "Even if it means me taking a chubby, I will suck it up."
Rosham: In one sitting I lost my pride, my dignity, my integrity, and my virginity, in what is now known as the Great Paper Brigade of 2006
Years with Mischief: 2006-2007
Lori Eich began her professional athletics career at the age of five,
competing in sidewalk bicycle (with training wheels) drag-racing in Spirit
Lake, Iowa. Unfortunately, after a record seventeen first-place finishes
in the six-and-under circuit, her racing came to an abrupt end when her
father accidentally ran over her bicycle in the driveway.
Lori, determined as ever, switched to competetive integrating and
differentiating, and her talents were quickly spotted by college
recruiters. Unbeknownst to the recruiters, nerd camp had also taught her
about ultimate frisbee. When she arrived at MIT, she shunned classes,
opting instead to help her college team compete numerous times at
Nationals. However, she still managed to get two degrees, primarily
because of her laundry-room dancing skills.
On the ultimate field, Lori will woo you with her good looks and humor,
and then break your heart when she shows you her wedding ring. Oh wait,
that's off the ultimate field. ON the field, get used to looking at her
hot ass, because that's all you'll see as she burns you on every cut. You
may also get to see some skin - specifically on her legs, as she skies men
in the end zone.