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# Roshan Baliga

Height: 69"
Weight: 12 stone
Nicknames: Roach
Position: Llama calendar reviewer at Amazon, Interior decorating assistant
Years with Mischief: 2006
Quote: "I'm so nice Mr. Rogers sued my ass for copyright infringement."
Roshan Danger Baliga is smarter than you, better looking than you, and will make you cry when he beats you to the disc over and over again. Then he'll invite you to his house for a beer, which will turn into 3 people and 4 beers, which will turn into 180 people, 7 kegs, and 20 cases of champagne, which will turn into the best prom of your life. Except Roshan is the one who will end up going home with your date.

Other fun facts about Roshan:
1) As a baby in the rough Indian suburbs of North Carolina, Roshan Danger Baliga acquired and defeated chicken pox, pneumonia, leprocy, malaria, bubonic plague, clubfoot, and polio. As a result, his bloodstream now carries antigens for over 37 trillion potential pathogens.
2) Roshan Danger Baliga organized 32 armed uprisings and won them all. He had 17 male children by 17 different women. He survived 14 attempts on his life, 73 ambushes, and a firing squad.
3) During a 6-month hike across Namibia, Roshan Danger Baliga felt hungry only once. He resolved the situation by chasing down and devouring the first animal he saw, which was a cheetah.